To be honest, lately, things have seemed a bit challenging. Success at work hasn't come as easily as it has in past years, though the effort and challenge has gone up. Elsewhere it has seemed like punch after punch has been coming my way on top of already feeling overextended and constantly tired. I even scheduled some vacation days just to stay in my house and get away from everybody and everything. And this is all on top of trying to plan a wedding. Then my grandfather passed away. And two weeks later, Bev's grandmother passed away.
Like you (probably) I think this image is weird. So it is a good segway into this disclaimer. Bev and I normally don't like to use the term "my season." It's, you know, churchy. But in this post, it seemed like the best description to use.
It has been pretty easy to get discouraged and want to quit the hard stuff. Especially stuff like the changes at work that I didn't choose in the first place. I started finding it easy to question if God has taken his favor from me. If maybe I had inadvertently headed down some path or made some decision that caused Him to be disp
leased with me.
In Psalm 22, I see that David felt similarly:
"My God, My God, why have You forsaken Me?
Why are You so far from helping Me,
And from the words of My groaning?
O My God, I cry in the daytime, but You do not hear;
And in the night season, and am not silent."
So I'm not the first son of God to wonder if God is mad at him just because things have gotten a little hard. Then I think about folks like Job and Abraham and Moses, and I realize that things got hard for all of them in the course of their obedience. God even told Moses to do something that He knew was going to fail and cause trouble at first.
At church last week, Anthony (the assistant minister of music at my church, if you're not already familiar with First Baptist Church of Glenarden) sung "It's Working" by Bishop William Murphy. That song says "This is my season for grace, for favor. This is my season to reap what I have sown." And it reminds me that "everything is working together for my good."
And while Anthony was exhorting through the song, I realized that when problem after problem arises and the punches just keep on coming even though I have done my best to be faithful, it's not because God has taken his grace and favor from me. It's because this is MY season for grace and favor. It is time for me to experience the same deliverance and grace that I tell everyone else about. It's my turn to go from glory to glory. And how can I experience it unless I go through something that makes me realize I need it?
And with that realization it is so much easier for me to sing "everything is working together for my good." I guess it's my season to reap what I have sown.
And if you have been experiencing the same thing, maybe it's yours too.